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Narcissistic Mother?

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It IS all about control. And winning. If he can keep even SOME of your things from you, in his mind he is winning. The more you act like you want your stuff, the more valuable it seems to him, and the more he wants to keep it. And by holding onto it, it leaves the door open for a possible interaction with you in the future, where he can either verbally abuse you and humiliate you some more OR just basic narcissistic supply.

I will PM you more details but I did not get all my belongings back. I even put my own belongings into the divorce decree and he STILL did not return some of them. People say, I should involve the police or lawyers to get these things back. This is exactly what he wants!!! Attention! Narcissist supply! If I bring the police he can trash talk me for years. Same thing if I involve lawyers. That's WHY he kept them. H.G Tudor (good resource suggestion this week. I just started reading it) has some wonderful entries this month (somewhere in March) about keeping our stuff. And I have just restored my relationship with my son so I can't afford to have him trash talking me anymore. The good relationship I finally have with my son is more valuable than my shi*t. I have CUT OFF his supply of attention from me. 

The way I see it, I bought my peace and freedom and the price was those belongings. Some of them are VERY sentimental! I just think to myself, it's like I had a fire. This happens to people all the time. A fire or a flood and they lose their precious momentos. It's sad but they move on thankful that they have their loved ones. That's what I do. To the people who tell me to stir up drama to get my momentos back I say "I'm gonna let karma take care of him." When it comes to karma you have to be patient. It may take years, but life will punish him for treating me this way. I can also use this as MY ammunition to those who think he is SO WONDERFUL and such a victim. He puts on a facade of a poor suffering victim of a divorce. But I KNOW, he's keeping my belongings just to be a as-whole. 

It's all a game. You chose to play or not. I suggest, not. Just like the car. He proved there his power and control. He won and he will win again. Let him. Then let karma get him! I'll pop the popcorn and we can watch it together! 

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