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Appletree

Dream

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Appletree

I have been following the forum but haven't posted in a while.

Things are still the same. I mostly live away but have been spending one or two nights a week in the old house because the kids have been living there mostly over the last few months. They were tired of the moving back and forth every few weeks so I do that to spend time with them. They didn't have a preference for where they lived in principle but they old house is considerably larger so probably better for longer periods. It has been going quite well generally although I had to spell out yet again that intimacy is not going to happen ever again. He was starting to make noises about it again but not forcing himself on me or anything like that. 

But I still get texts specifically from the younger one that he yells at her and last night it was so bad she said she thought he was going to hit her. I don't think he will but as the older one had already arranged to come to my place for a few weeks from the weekend (not for any particular reason as he rarely yells at that child) I said to the younger one to come then too.

And now I just woke up from a dream. In that dream  he was berating me for something he often berates me and the kids for. I protested my innocence and he backhanded me (and missed). He then fell to the floor with a heart attack. His face morphed into that of my father. I just stood there thinking "good" and waiting for it to be done. I calmly picked up the phone to call emergency services and then I woke up.  I guess the universe may be trying to tell me something...

Oh and by the way I don't think he will actually become physically violent, at least not to persons although he has thrown things around in the past. 

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