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karaokekat1017

It wasn't the first time, just the last

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karaokekat1017

For me, it all started in 2011. But I warned him that I would leave if he did it again. Prior to that time, I remember us being a great couple. Shortly after, things changed. It's only now that I've been able to look back and realize all of the things. It seemed that I had done the following; I didn't pack his lunch, I forgot to pay a bill, I didn't make his food before mine or the kids, I only thought of me. I was called selfish, stupid, a lady dog, greedy, irresponsible, lazy, a cheater, a liar, and twice was told that I shouldn't be working because I'm not with the kids enough. Perhaps, I was just to blinded by being in love with him to see what was going on. Sunday I told him don't call me Hun at when we were working. He got so pissed off about that and refused to work and left. I get home that night tried to be intimate thinking that's what he wants just give it to him so he pushed my arm off of him. Knowing that I wasn't going to be able to sleep I grabbed the keys to his van thinking hey I'll grab a can of amp from his car. As I'm going down the front step steps he bust open the front door still not saying a thing to me throws his hand out demanding his keys I told him I'm not leaving I just want to get a drink. So I proceed to the van. He runs over pushed the van door on me as I'm getting a can of amp, pushes me out of the way and slammed the door and locked the van. Thinking to myself why is this a big deal? I'll use the spare key fob from the bedroom. I begin to walk back out the door with the fob telling him I'm getting a drink. Instead of saying anything he jumps up and runs toward me. Before I can get to the door he grabs my left arm and twists it around to my back crippling my ability to move. I squeeze tight to the key fob shouting get off of me and I'll give it to you he replies with give me the key fob and I'll let go. I said just get off me you're hurting me. He keeps trying to hold me down and pry my right hand open all the while I'm kicking him off me. Finally when I realize he's not stopping act now before it gets worse I yell for his daughter saying call the cops call the cops. She, and her two younger siblings come in the room while he's still over me. He grabs my right ankle and drags me off the couch causing my back to hit the floor hard. I said stop doing this the kids don't need to see you like this. He doesn't stop. He once again grabs at my ankle and and steps on my leg while pulling on my arm. I tell his daughter to grab my phone and call 911. She does and he tells her no need for that. Don't call them. She didn't listen to him and for the first time ever I was glad that she didn't listen to him. As soon as he realized that she was on the phone with them he let go. One of the children ran to me to hug me and he pulled the couch behind me out and (accidentally) hit the back of my head with it to retrieve his keys. Then he left and came back and was arrested on the spot. So now yes I'm feeling really dumb that any of this happened and I feel like I've let everyone down and like I can't do right. I honestly was so much in love with him that it made me blind. This is the story that I have had to repeat over and over and over and over to the point where I am literally in tears every night and not able to sleep. My kids and I are safe now but tomorrow is father's day and I'm scared to death that his family will try something to get the kids. the TPO that was issued protects all of us from him coming near us. I really and truly am terrified to go to sleep now.

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Bennu

I am so sorry. ((Hugs)) Have you called the national domestic abuse hotline? They can tell you about resources in your area. There is help available.

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karaokekat1017

We are staying with family for now. He's been telling people I work with that I've made it all up. I didn't have bruises the night it happened. But the marks showed up within a day. I didn't notice one on my leg as I hadn't been able to change my clothes since I was limited on what I could take with me and focused on the kids' belongings more than my own. I'm working with women helping women but they are only able to provide me information for transitional housing. I have two special needs children so that's not really any option for me. My best friend has be been talking about sharing a 4 bedroom somewhere too. To add to that, there was a car that went in and out of the parking lot at work numerous times tonight which had me checking my car before I got it.

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Bennu

Having a special needs child kept me in for too long. It makes it more challenging to leave but also more rewarding when you see the improvement in the child. That family setting is hard on the children.

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Quaddie

Take pics of the bruises and ask to add them to the police file ...or all them to take pics to add.

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karaokekat1017

Take pics of the bruises and ask to add them to the police file ...or all them to take pics to add.

I took pictures as soon as I noticed them and emailed them to the prosecuting attorney that the state has. This is just all so very much to me.

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EnoughisEnough

Karaokekat1017

Hang in there!! I just called the police for the first time last week and have been plagued with guilt and sadness and anger. Believe me, not asking for their help for two years just increased and escalated the abuse. It's hard to have the energy to get things done but keep asking for help. You don't deserve to be treated that way or your children to be. Please take good care of yourself.

 

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