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Confused714

Mind going in circles

8 posts in this topic

I feel like my mind is going in circles. I know I have been posting a lot. I am just so confused right now. It's like one minute I'm sure I know what I want to do and the next I'm not. I feel like tug of war is going on in my brain. When he is being nice I'm like how could I ever go. How could I break up the family. Then when he gets angry and yells it reminds me. I get all the bad feelings. I am meeting with a lawyer Monday which I'm sure has me super freaked.  I have emergency stuff already at someone's house so I am ready if the time comes that I get brave enough. Is this how everyone felt near the end? Was it a constant struggle?  

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It's normal. You are taking a big step.

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Definitely normal. I was exhausted near the end from all that. 

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On 8/11/2017 at 8:51 AM, Confused714 said:

I feel like my mind is going in circles. I know I have been posting a lot. I am just so confused right now. It's like one minute I'm sure I know what I want to do and the next I'm not. I feel like tug of war is going on in my brain. When he is being nice I'm like how could I ever go. How could I break up the family. Then when he gets angry and yells it reminds me. I get all the bad feelings. I am meeting with a lawyer Monday which I'm sure has me super freaked.  I have emergency stuff already at someone's house so I am ready if the time comes that I get brave enough. Is this how everyone felt near the end? Was it a constant struggle?  

This is normal.. I've been going thru the same thing for months now. Just keep pushing and reading and watching YouTube whatever you have to do. 

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FWIW, I think it's normal for any big decision. I've been doing the same for a job change (leaving primarily because it's somewhat abusive, so it parallels). 

 

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This is exactly what I'm feeling like right now.  And it is exhausting.  I feel like I must be a spoiled brat, that he does so much and is so good.  And then I glimpse back into "the deep" and I know what's really down there, and I know it's going to all come spewing out again, and I know I have to leave.  I have the family court lawyer appointment soon, and I'm trying to find a criminal lawyer who practices in federal court to discuss the FBI crap with, but so far I can't find one.  

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It's normal. You can do it. I did.

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