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Abusiveness and Extreme Right Wing Views

8 posts in this topic

I wonder if there's a connection between extreme right wing views and a higher chance of being abusive. For the purposes of selecting dates from online sites maybe it would be a very useful initial line of questioning? For my part I would treat it as a red flag I think.

I mean is it possible to have extreme right wing views and NOT be abusive? (or maybe I'm taking it too far)

I keep seeing the similarities again and again and again..I keep thinking wow this sounds familiar - anyone else?

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I'm not sure if there is a relationship between extreme right-wing views and abusiveness.

However, if you're not comfortable with extreme right-wing views, then don't consider dating anyone with those views. You're going to be more comfortable with someone who's outlook on life is similar to yours.

I know for myself, the first year after I moved to Atlanta (when I was doing quite a bit of dating), I never dated anyone whose profile indicated that they were "conservative." It just didn't make sense-especially since those who label themselves "conservatives" around here, are very conservative compared to people I was used to in the Baltimore/Washington area. I didn't meet huge numbers of guys that were comfortable with my independence and more liberal viewpoint, but that was OK.

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I would say that I know a few right wing conservatives and no way are the abusive. They are kind, caring and lovely people. I do NOT agree with alot of what they think but they certainly are not about control, or victimizing or power. They just happen to strongly believe in things that are totally different than what I believe in.

I have dated men who are conservative. It never lasted long because our core values were similar but our views on society because of our core values were very different.

In the end, I think it isn't about the politics at all, it is about the level of compatibility and resepct between two people.

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the word is "Extreme" which you can insert in front of any demographic

I think abusers glob onto places where they can assert "Control" you can call me right wing conservative.

And I left an abusive man, but I didnt think that was the reason, he just misused tenants of thought, more in the church,,,

But I dont want to say Conservative Christians are abusive, its like comparing Westboro Baptist to all Christians or Baptists, its a SMALL tiny percentage and extreme people that twist things.

I think when one gets into anything extreme and starts acting like their God, thats where trouble comes in

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Well, I know from hanging around the tea party types that they are extremely old fashioned and controlling in regards to women. For example, it was a general consensus that women shouldn't be allowed to vote. Even most of the women believed that. They blamed the break down of the country on the women's rights movement. One woman even said she'd gladly give up her right to vote if it would save the country. I realized I would never get along with them. Regarding DV they generally believed it was both party's fault and that women are disregarding their place in the home, and it was angering the men. They are pretty right wing.

However, there are other conservatives that have more modernized views on things. Just because someone is more to the right or left doesn't mean the person is abusive. There are many on the left that are abusive as well.

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Oh my abusive ex was totally left, very liberal, almost hippy like views...

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I suspect anyone who ascribes to a "fundamentalist" point of view. The "far left" comes across as emotionally rigid and absolute as does the far right. It's not so much, IMO, a matter of right versus left, it's a matter of people who find concordance within themselves with any sort of extremity.

Islam gets a bad rap from the outrageous, murderous behavior of their fundamentalist sects. The Christians who murder doctors willing to perform abortion are equally outrageous, murderous and "fundamentalist".

Any person ascribing to "fundamentalist" views can be dangerously bigoted, simply because such extreme views isolate them.

Isolation itself causes damage. The isolation of the abuse victim, the isolation of the deliberately close-minded neo-Nazi communes in North Idaho, the isolation of the "Mormon" sects most recently in the news for enforcing child marriage . . . it's not so much the BELIEF system that has unusual "power". It is the human tendency to seek validation for their self-centered pogroms that has "unusual power". Whatever is hoisted on the petard is replaceable by Left Wing, Right Wing, fundamentalist Christian/Mormon/Evangelical/Taliban ideology. It's not so much the ideology, it is the core groups efforts to enforce their ideologies upon social groups.

Bink

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I believe it's easy to see the abusers in the extreme fundamentalist, or extreme right-wing groups. I personally can see it perpetuated through my old "crowd" of the extreme conservative Evangelicals who are so anti-equal rights etc.

I believe those evangelical groups also practice spiritual abuse, and I believe I was subjected to it a lot which is one reason my senses were nulled when I was being abused by my ex emotionally. I had come to recognize ultimatums as equivalent to love. I had come to be familiar with the concept that I was always screwing up and having to "make it up" to my God to show my love and devotion to him. So that was easy to transcribe over to my spouse. I had to come to equate all these political ideas as being conditional to my salvation, even to the point that these political ideas actually CONFLICTED with what the Bible actually says! But it was so hard-wired into my belief system that I rationalized it all away.

My entire faith and Christianity has been revolutionized by my abuse education. I no longer tolerate people telling me what I HAVE to believe. I no longer constantly look for ways to apologize to God for my existence, I now believe that he loves me just the way HE created me :) And he's not constantly expecting me to grovel and apologize for my lowly human existence. I'm actually perfectly happy with myself! When I visit churches, like those I grew up in, that are always having "altar calls" to correct some imperfection in the lives of it's members, I walk out the door instead of racing to the pulpit to ask forgiveness. I no longer think God expects me to be miserable until I find forgiveness at the altar every week.

I've also learned to separate my politics from that of my church leaders politics. I believe that God expects us all to think for ourselves, and look at the facts rationally. I no longer believe there is a set of rules I have to follow or a set of political beliefs I have to follow to be a Christian.

The problem with the way I was raised, and the way a lot of my Extreme Right Evangelical relatives still live, is that they believe you MUST do it their way, or you're condemned to hell. YOU MUST believe LIKE THEM or you're not a "true Christian" and you obviously believe in infant murder. They leave you NO other alternatives.

When you try to argue politics with them, they turn it into a verbally abusive personal attack. They say horrible things to your face. They "define" their opposition in ad hominem logical fallacies (aka verbal abuse) instead of addressing the facts of the issue.

It's very disturbing to me. Since becoming a LOT more liberal the last few years, I've alienated some of my more crazy relatives. I've only ever attempted to go back and repair the relationship with one of my aunts, and since then I refuse to talk politics with her.

ANY belief system, that is SO STRONG, that it cannot hear alternative viewpoints without defining them irrationally is abusive. I will not go to a church that negatively defines me anymore. I do not believe this is something that is good for me to go and listen to anymore. I was raised in pentacostal churches with "open prophesying" and my mother actually pointed out how she would have to doubt the "prophesies" when every time they just slammed the body of Christ for "Not being holy enough" or "not being devoted enough" or "Not giving 100% to Christ" or "Not witnessing enough" or whatever. And she was right! But there are pastors and politicians who are the same. Did you hear what Mike Huckabee had to say after Obama won the election? HE BLAMED THE CHURCH FOR NOT GETTING OUT THERE TO VOTE!!!! The thought never occurred to him that maybe he LOST the church's vote because....omg....Obama actually is also an Evangelical Christian? Just not of the same Conservative Social values that Huckabee and the extreme right has determined HAS to be attributed to the church?

I just can't handle that type of belief system, I can't be defined by other people anymore. I can't be controlled through guilt anymore.

I've been through too much hellandhighwater to care anymore if Mike Huckabee thinks I'm a Christian. Or if my aunt and uncle think I'm a Christian. Or even if my parents think I am. Although, I had it out with my mom and told her SHE COULD NOT TELL ME WHAT I WAS anymore. (and with her it was over the Harry Potter books. It totally blew her mind that I told her I was still a Christian and I could read Harry Potter......)

I do think you can get this as an extreme from either side, but I think it's easier to see right now in Extreme Movements that out there telling people who and what they are. Like, I refuse to respond to my friends' topics on facebook when they start out with "Anyone who doesn't see X fact is an idiot" well...don't define me as an idiot if you want discussion on your topic. K?

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