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About Chloe

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    No woman .... No cry
  • Birthday 08/20/1970

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    Down Under
  1. No you're definitely NOT being over sensitive. This is NOT normal behaviour. He is being extremely controlling and some of his messages sound pretty delusional as well. He doesn't sound safe at all. I strongly encourage you to reach out to a local DV support group. ((((Hugs)))) you're in the right place. We understand.
  2. Fantastic letter!
  3. . Hey Grabby So sorry you're going through this, my heart goes out to you. I felt really yuk reading what happened on the plane and can only imagine how horrendous it was for you, and your little girl. I just wanted to comment on the whole debate on calling your son an a-hole. I personally think there's a difference between saying to someone "you're an a-hole" and what you said above, which is "you're ACTING LIKE an a-hole" .... Same as being called a beeyotch or being told you're behaving like one, KWIM? I do hope you can find some peace with your son by the wedding because it is such a special day for you & I imagine you do want your son to be a part of it, of course as long as he acts appropriately. (((hugs))) Chloe
  4. Kiboo, I really feel for you, you're obviously in so much emotional pain ((((hugs)))). I agree with VPC, you are not a failure or letting anyone down in reaching out for help, quite the opposite. I do hope you get some help soon and please be gentle with yourself.
  5. Exactly! I've seen some super nasty comments made about Christie. I agree BB ... I remember a comment Mr Poor Me's son said to me once "Mum said she hope's you're safe" .. at the time I was insulted on behalf of my ex because of course HE was HER victim, not the other way around but when the time came and I finally left for good, I felt I could contact her, she'd let me know in her own way that she "got it". Been there, done that, as have most of us I would imagine! He would tell me how different I was to those "other women" and that only I understood him etc and on and on <vomit> ... this is a good example of the hell that is being with a Narc!
  6. This was posted by a fb page I'm on, some of you may have also seen this: READ THE ARTICLE HERE: [/NYPOST article herequote] Shaw sounds like a nasty b-word ... however those of us who've been blinded by a narc can prob relate to her delusions.
  7. Sheri, hun, I reckon the best way to tell if your husband is lying .. is if his lips are moving!!! He's an abusive LYING douchebag and CHOOSES to head *rythmes with duck* you on a continual basis ... that's NOT love. You deserve soooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better!
  8. Exacary!!
  9. Hi Babydoll! I'm in a weekly support group in Vic, Australia. I found it by ringing my local council at the time. This support group is weekly and has been ongoing for many years, I've since learned this is unusual, so I was very lucky to find it. It is so nice to be able to talk to/listen to other women who really "get" what you've been through with regard to abusive relationships. Some of the women in this group are still "in", some are on their way out, some have been out for many years and each offers their own wisdom on their experience. The group is facilitated by 2 DV counsellors who are wonderful people.
  10. ((((((((((((Kiboo))))))))))))) I lost one of my closest & dearest friends to cancer 4 months ago and I grieve for her every single day. I've found for me, I've been shocked a few times at how entirely distraught I feel and it's most certainly not the same as losing a partner. It's very early days hun, it's all so very raw. I agree with Seren, that grief counselling could really help. To have someone to talk it out with, to scream & cry or whatever you need to do. I still talk to my friend all the time, I will say out loud (when I'm alone) "I miss you so much hun!" ... I will talk to her about what's happening in my life and I find being able to verbalise helps somewhat. I probably sound like a loon to some people but I believe your loved one is still close by, just not in a physical sense as such. Grief is a very personal thing and everyone does it differently, there's no "right" or "wrong" ways to do it ... it really is one day (sometimes minute) at a time.
  11. ^^ I agree with DK Just give yourself a break ((((Kiboo))))
  12. Well said Curly. ((((Kiboo)))) I lost one of my best friends to cancer a few months ago, my heart aches for you. Please be gentle with yourself.
  13. (((Sheri))) Have you read "Why does he do that?" ?? If not, I highly recommend you do. If yes, I highly recommend you do again.
  14. Depression is very much a "real illness".
  15. Devil Kitty ... I couldn't agree more, beautifully said. TL, congrats on being out 2 years I have to say though that you sound angry and resentful towards your daughter. You've both been through so much at the hands of your ex, and your daughter is only 18, that's A LOT for a young woman to deal with. She was his prime target in many ways and yes she's angry, and has a right to be, as do you - for the way he treated both of you. TL, please remember, your daughter is NOT him. Listen to what your girl is actually saying here. It's really important for feelings to be validated, as you well know yourself. I get the feeling that you feel your daughter is trying to stop you from being happy and how dare she etc ... I don't feel that's the case at all, I would say she feels abandoned, again. It sounds like she felt abandoned when her father was mentally torturing her on a daily basis and you would'nt leave ... then once you did leave you focused your attention on your new b/f and now you're moving in with him. All this in 2 years is A LOT for her to take in. Out of interest TL, did you ask the kids if they are happy/comfortable moving in with your b/f? Perhaps your girl is thinking "what about me!?" I'm not saying for a minute you're neglecting your daughter, or anything like that hun, I just feel your girl really needs her Mum. And honestly, I would have reacted similarly to her with the example you gave of something she suggested being swept aside and when your b/f suggests it you make it a rule ... perhaps she's thinking "I don't feel heard" ?? I feel she's crying out for you TL, please don't be angry with her. She loves you and needs you.