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About amaranth

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    Welcome Newbie
  1. Quaddie, thank you so, so much for your kind and thoughtful response. You are right; I deleted my post because it felt like a betrayal. I was terrified that they'd find it, and that the detail I included was enough for them to recognise it, although I know it would have been unlikely. I'm sorry for my poor timing in deleting it, and so grateful that you put so much time and kindness into rewriting it. They have changed a lot over the years, and I don't want to hurt them by bringing up the past, even if not directly to them. But at the same time I am realising more and more how much it has and still does affect me, and I realise that I need to work through it for the sake of my own mental health. I'm thankful that you understand so much of what I wrote, and the explanations you offer make a lot of sense. It is very scary to start acknowledging these things, but I see that it is also necessary. I will go and look into the books you recommended now. Again, thank you so much for your kindness. I did not expect any response after I deleted my post, not to mention one filled with so much compassion and help.