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A Weight Lifted

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About A Weight Lifted

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 06/18/1970

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  • Interests
    Poetry, Performance, Motivational & Inspirational Speaking
  1. It's the most awful thing in the world. The chills, fever, aches, pains, cramps, COUGHING & SORE THROAT... it is just unbelievable how the bod can turn on you like that. pray for my strength. I need to be in Vegas on the 4th of next month. A Weight Lifted. and, no... I don't know if it is the "s" flu. The results havent come back yet.
  2. I tried to reserve a room?? No luck. Are they sold out? AWL
  3. I treid to use the on-line reservation link three times. It keeps sending me to an error page. Maybe , Ill just call the number. Or are the rooms gone?? AWL
  4. Tenderheart, I honestly have to say that when I think of the x, I have no choice but to recognize how my expectations played such a great, great part in the madness. Many of those "dreams" were based on an incomplete "me". A person who didnt see that I could have done much, not all, but much of what I was "dreaming" about on my own. Had I been in a better place, prior too, I truly don't think I would have put sooo much stake into him. Not at the level that I did and certainly not at the price I paid, to come out , in the end WORSE than I was when I started. I hope it makes sense. I havent read all your replies. But, this is what I remind myself to acknowledge if I even THINK I want to go down the "what we could have had" memory lane. AWL
  5. Hmmmm, with slight variation this part sounds familiar. He begs for attention...wants to dance or tell his sad & hurtful "life story", for hours and hours THEN//OR when he doesnt get the interaction turns to the critical and insulting behavior. Without fail. So he gets a fix, huh?? Yep. Very interesting. AWL
  6. What is a ragealcoholic
  7. Happy Birthday
  8. What exactly lands you at this conclusion?
  9. Does anyone know whether or not this constitues abuse and/or alcoholism So the guy is a "wonderful" guy; quiet, non-argumentative, caring, helpful, thoughtful and generous until he gets sloppy, bowled over/pass out drunk. The drunken binges ocurr about once every three to six weeks. Typically on a Sat & Sun day night, when there is no work the next day. The more the drinks go down...the more insulting, offensive, critical, insensitive, and uncaring statements come out. Anything from calling his offspring names, cursing out & belittling his mother and verbally attacking & insulting his girlfriend. Every day behavior, goes out the window ----- when this guy is intoxicated. I have witnessed this guy in action, it's so unbelievable. Just curious, if anyone ever experienced this. AWL
  10. I am so in agreement with the birthday club idea. I really wanted to suggest it but I thought you'd have to make a special forum for certain credible and well -known members and that that may be bias. Still thre may be alterior motived members on here....blah, blah, blah and the list goes on and on. Plus, it would require a bit of extra work and I know how exhausting it can be to run these boards...so basically, I didnt suggest it. BUT, since you did ...I'm definitely in. Where do we sign up??? AWL
  11. O.k. Curly, I know I am late here but, I just have to say a sentence or two or three to you about this. ( And, I know that you certainly aren't the one for the pity party or anything in that realm, this for you is just a matter of perspective. But... Without a birthday, one would no longer be here. Without a birthday, there is death. So first let's always remember to carry that thankfulness within and when we are thankful for life --IMO, I think we have little to be mopey about as far as the birthday thing goes. I know you want some shred of acknowledgement and it hurts a bit to not SEE that someone has given a extra thought of you to do that "extra". But, what I started doing a few years ago is prior to my birthda, I'd purchase something that I want, I DON'T care about what's due or neccessart for the house. It's my birthday treat to me. I rent a movie that I want, typically a new release, I get take out from one of MY favoite places. And I enjoy acknowledging myself. Trust me, I am in no way saying that you, me or anyone else shouldn't have some desire for the extra attention from another , person. I'm just saying, I do make an extra effort to celebrate me. Because truly that beats, sitting somewhere with people who (for whatever reason) didnt do anything. You still end up feeling bad, when you know it wasn't effort on their part, so next year, plan something special for you. And maybe at some point in the past you were doing this already, just don't stop. Keep the tradition going. Oh and Happy Birthday. You truy are a wise and special woman. ((((((hugs to you, Curly )))))) BTW, can you PM me your address? AWL
  12. Thank you al so much for your words. I feel much, much better that I did last week this tome. I am stiull in a bit of disbelief but, I am now convinced that I will be able to get through tthius. Thanks again, everyone. AWL
  13. Thank you all so, so, so much. I truly appreciate the words of love and encouragement. It has been a rough, rough three days. I swear it seems like it';s been a month and it's only been three days. But, I'm trying to get through. LB, that means a great deal, because I've been beating myself up and down, side to side. I'm headed out to Chicago for Nic's funeral. I have mustered up the energy to throw something in a bag and make the five hour trip there for tomorrow. I do have one bit of comfort. The woman who does alll my graphic arts work also knew Ncole. She told me that she told Nichole that I'd completed the book and that it was dedicated to her. I'm very happy about that. I'll talk to you when I return. Hopefully seeing so many friends and writers will be healing for me. Thanks again all. I really appreciate you guys AWL
  14. I met her in 1996 and we were inseperable. We joked one night a few years ago because we calculated at least 10,000 hours of phone time. We traveled out of town together on several excursions. If there was a literary event in our area, we 'd always go togetehr. We were two peas in a pod. She was a great friend. She was like my sister. We were closer to each other than we are to our biological siblings. In as much, I wore her out with the ups and downs of my addictive relationship/marriage to the addict/abuser. And, back in August of 2007, right before the ex relapsed -- before he and I split up; she and I were talking on the phone and I was rambling on about him. She became audibly irritated and probably overwhelmed. She said something about my continuing to be with a man who didnt love me, abruptly ended the conversation and said she would call me back. We never spoke again. I understood why she did that, but I was still a bit angry. Then anger diminished and pride stepped in. In the last few months, I'd requested her as a friend on FB, she added me. Everytime I kogged on after that, I thought about communicating with her. But, on about three different occassions in the last month, I REALLY wanted to send her a message. But stubbornness, and pride stopped me from simply saying "Hi" and hitting " send". I took for granted that one day she and I would reunite. I took for granted that one day I would apologize for dragging her through the years and years of subjecting her to the pain of watching me in pain. That we'd tell each other how much we'd missed one another and things would be back to normal again. Now, it's too late. She'll never know that the book I just completed is dedicated to her. She'll never know that I missed her thoroughly and completely. I am devsatated. She was 40 and died of a massive heart attack. I nearly went into a state of mania when I got the call. I have had to take sleeping pills. I don't know how to repair this for myself. Life will never be the same. I've cried for two days straight.
  15. Happy Birthday Whisker, And, many, many, many more!!! A Weight Lifted